AITA for refusing to buy my stepdaughter a new car after I helped my son buy a new one last year?
I have 2 kids, 1 bio son who’s 34 and my stepdaughter who’s just turned 16.
I’ve known my stepdaughter since she was 4 or so and she’s like my own child, and I’ve enjoyed raising her more than I enjoyed raising my own son because I never really ever got to ever see him growing up.
When my son was 16, I purchased an old beat up truck for him, I was poor, he was very grateful, and the kid reacted like it was the best gift on earth.
Since then my business has expanded comfortably and I’m moderately successful. I drive a new car because I’ve earned it, my wife drives a new car because she deserves it, my kid does NOT need or deserve a brand new car.
she has been begging for a Tesla ever since she found out she would be getting a car, and once I told her that wasn’t happening, she became upset and accused me of loving my son more than her.
I asked her why she’d think that, when I’ve given my daughter FAR more opportunities than I could have ever given my son, and she brought up the fact that I helped my son buy a new car last year.
It’s true- I did. However, my son is 34, I gave him a cash gift because he’s a sensible, hard working family man who’s never asked a dime from me, and he lived a very very different life to what my daughter is accustomed to. And you know what, I’d do the same for her if she was also his age. But a 16 year old doesn’t need a new car just because her friends have them.
She is upset enough about it that my in laws, her grandparent, are causing a ruckus and are accusing me of favoritism, that kids today have a different set of values than when my son was 16, that I’m able to afford a better life for my daughter so why not? Every time my wife and I have tried to speak with them civilly they bring up that circumstances are different and even the area we live in has stricter emission laws so it would be better for her to get a Tesla- I was never planning on getting her a shitty old run around, but t wasn’t ever going to be anything top of the range.
FWIW my wife thinks we should completely rescind the gift of a car for our daughter due to her attitude, I’m on the fence but unhappy about the direction this is headed in.
AITA?
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